hi,main us sapne ko sach karna chahta tha jo sirf ek sapna tha,,, baat un dino ki hai jab main PGDCA karne ke liye gaya tha. meri class august se start hone wali thi to main bahut late gaya hua tha jiske karad main apne class me kisi ko nahi pahchanta tha, par wanha mera ek friend pahle se tha. Wahi bas mera ek friend tha aur usne bhi apna ek friend circle banaya tha. Jab main pahli baar class pahucha to class start ho chuka tha jiske karad main abhi bhi kisi se jan pahchan nahi bana paya tha. Class lagatar 2 hour chala phir lunch ka time ho gaya to mera jo friend tha wo aur uske friends canteen ja rahe the, mere firend ne mujhe bhi apne sath le gaya. Usne kaha to main chala gaya aur usne sabhi se mere ko introduce karaya, usme ek ladki mujhe bahut pasand aayi use dekhte hi bahut nervous ho gaya and un sabhi ke beech khud ko bahut odd feel kar raha tha,,,,,,,, Phir sabhi ne khane ka order diya to tabhi sabhi TEA le rahe the…. isi me itne me ek ladki ne kaha ki “TEA peene se log kale padte hai” ye sun kar mujhe thodi 2 hasi aa rahi thi, maine socha ki itne Gore log kale kyo nahi padte jo roj tea peete hai hai….. Bade kamal ki baat to ye thi ki wo ye dialog dekar khud baad me pee rahi thi…ye baat kisi aur ne nahi balki usi ne kahi thi jise dekhkar mai bahut khus tha,,,,, uski ye baat sun kar to mai aur bhi impress hi gaya tha aur sochne laga tha kuch to baat hai usme jo aur kisi me nahi hai…. Mujhe apne school and college life me koi bhi ladki pasand nahi aayi par use jab dekha to achha gaga….ye to mera first day tha.. hum dono ek hi section ke the, phir bhi meri usse dosti nahi hui ho gaya kabhi 2 baat ho jati thi….. mai hamesa chup chup kar use dekhta rahta tha aur uske baat gaur se sunta tha…..aur hamesa uske peeche wale desk me baitha tha jisse mai use sun saku….mujhe pata nahi wo ye sab janti thi ya nahi…… yaise dekhte dekhte 1 sem beetne laga mai kuch nahi kar paya bas use follow hi karta raha….. Uske baare me mujhe kuch khas pata nahi tha, mere friend ne bataya tha wahi janta tha ki wo ASAM ki hai. haaaa par wo class me sabse beutiful and haseen thi…kuch ladke use sexy girl ka bhi khitab dete the …. par mai un ladko ki neeyat se wakif tha. Use jab bhi dekhta to mere dil ki dhadkan badh jati thi mujhe pata nahi ye darr tha mera ya phir kuch aur hi…. bas mujhe ek baat thik se pata tha ki wo mujhse 4 year badi hai ..wo near about 27 thi to mai 23 ka phir bhi mujhe wo bahut pasand thi…. Wo din aa gaya jis din ka mujhe kabse intzaar tha jaise ki use hamesa follow karta tha to wo college ke pass hi room lekar rahti thi to mai class ke baad rojana wahi apne dosto ke sath ghumta rahta tha… mera room wahi se 5 km door tha to us din bhi 6 ke kareeb wo market ja rahi thi to use aata dekh mere ek friend ne mujhe akela chor diya kyonki use pata tha ki mai uske liye hi waha aata tha varna mera kya kaam hoga… October ka month tha din jaldi dhal jata tha to raat hone lagti thi, mujhe akela dekh usne pucha kya kar rahe ho yahan to maine kah diya bas dosto ke pass tha…sach baat to ye hai mai uska hi wait kar raha tha.. phir usne mujhse kaha humare sath market chaloge? to phir bhala mai chance kyo jane deta… wo apne friend ke sath thi par mujhe pata tha ki usne yuhi kaha tha par mujhe to uske kareeb jane ka bahana chahiye tha… phir hum logo ne kareeb 1 hour sath me spend kiya , use kareeb se sunne, dekhne and samjhne ka mauka mila.. Kisi karad use apne ghar jana pada, uski train raat ko thi ye baat mujhe pata tha to uske itna kareeb to nahi tha ki use station chorne ja saku par mai use dekhne jarur ja sakta tha,,,mere dil ne yahi kaha to mai apne friend ke sath station chale gaye ,, mere friend ne mujhe suggest kiya ki aaj mauka mile to thik se dosti kar lena kyonki mere friend ko wo thik se janti thi,,, hum dono station me kareeb 2 hour uska wait karte rahe .hume thik se pata nahi tha ki uska kis train me reservation hai to hum log jaldi aa gaye the… jaise hi mere friend ne bataya ki wo aa gayi ye sun kar mai bahut khus huya par meri khusi dekhte hi dekhte hi gum me badal gaya… mai dil hi dil bahut ro raha tha ye baat mere dost ko bhi pata chal gaya tha kyonki wo ek ladke ke sath aayi thi….. phir mere dost ne samjhaya ki raat ko ek akeli ladki jab station ghar se door ho to kaise jayegi.. par mai apne gum se bahar nahi nikal pa raha tha aur mere aankho se aasnu bah rahe the.. mere aansu es karad nahi gir rahe the kyonki wo kisi ke sath aayi thi gum es baat ka tha kisi ko pahli baar pasand kiya wo bhi…. mai uske aane ka besabri se intzaar karne laga phir wo 5-6 din baad aayi.. Jab wo class aayi sun kar ye bada jhatka laga ki uski ingagment ho chuki hai…Wo class me hamesa apne mobile pe busy rahti thi yani period ke time bhi sms karti rahti thi… phir mai use dekh kar hi khus rahta tha, ab dosti aage badhane ka mann nahi karta tha…par pata nahi kismat ko kya manzoor tha… pata nahi mann ko kya hua main hamesa uske bare apne dosto se puchta rahta tha jo uske room ke pass rahte the…uske baare me mujhe koi na koi information mil jati thi, agar wo apne dosto ke sath ghumne ya movies bhi jati thi to mujhe pata chal jata tha… Uski yaado me itna kho gaya tha ki thik se koi kaam nahi kar pata tha, sab kuch bhool sa jata tha bas yaad rahti thi to uski baate aur uska smiling face… jab wo khule hair karke class aati to class ke pure ladke usi ko niharte ho… Udhar kismat ka ek naya Khel kisi karad usne apna group chor diya hai to mujhe uske pass jaane ka mauka mil gaya.. Isi beech maine apna dost ko kho diya ye koi aur nahi balki wahi tha jisne mere us ladki se introdce karaya tha aur humari dosti 10 year se thi hum log sath me boarding school and 3 year college me roommate the…Use khone ka mujhe bahut dukh tha par kahi na kahi es baat ki tassali thi ki hum log baad me mil jayenge. mere life me ek naya friend bhi aa raha…. Diwali ka time aa gaya tha maine bahut himmat karke use movies jane ko kaha aur usne kaha kab jaana hai.. ye sun kar mai khus kam huya par sochne laga ki usne haa kaise kar diya kyonki wahi kahti thi ki use Movies dekhne ka koi interest nahi hai…. par meri kismat itni kharab nahi thi..mera luck bahut time mere favour me rahta tha …… Aaj bhi mujhe yaad hai wo meri zindagi ka ek special day 11 nov jab wo mall aayi thi usne jeens pant and shirt pahna thi… Actual me movie to ek bahana tha mai to uske sath bahut time spend karna chahta tha wo pure mere sath raat 8 baje tak thi,, Diwali me apne ghar nahi ja rahi thi to use bhi pooja ka samaan lena tha jiske karad late ho gaya tha… Us din jab mai use kareeb se baat kar raha tha to apne khusi ko sambhal nahi pa raha tha…. us pal ko aur bhi haseen banana chahta tha, socha ki phir pata nahi wo din kab aaye ki hum dono akele sath ho.. to use bahut gift dena chahta tha par wo kuch nahi lena chahti thi, phir maine use ek locket diya. mere bahut jeed karne se wo le li thanks to her.. Sach baat ye hai pata ki mai bhool gaya tha ki kisi girls ke liye itna asan nahi hota ki kisi se kuch bhi le le, bas mujhe apni khusi dikh rahi thi.. Par usne wo chain to le liya par aaj tak maine kabhi use 2 minut bhi pahne nahi dekha…Is baat ka mujhe bahut dukh hai.. dusre din diwali hone ke karad mai apne ghar aa gaya,, uske sath beetaye huye ek ek pal ko lekar itna khus tha ki mai bata nahi sakta… mere ghar me bhi koi nahi tha papa mummy village gaye the to akela tha to apne dosto ke sath time bita raha tha…Raat ko mai uske bare me soch raha tha to uska call aaya usne mujhe diwali wish kiya phir kaha ki ye “chain mere life ka sabse anmol gift hai yiasa mujhe aaj tak mere papa and mummy ne bhi nahi diya jo tumne diya hai ” jab tak ghar me tha to roj raat ko hum log baat karte the… phir 5-6 din baad class jana start ho gaya phir dheere dheere wo mere sath ghumne lagi… par class me use bahut ladke pasand karte the infact ek ladka aur bhi tha jo use station chorne aaya tha… phir hum log sath me bahut time spend karne lage.. Usne mujhe apne life ke bare me bataya ki uska shadi 2 year pahle fix ho chuki thi,, Ha wo ladko se bahut nafrat karti thi she always say ” All men are DOg “.. uski baate sun kar kahi na kahi mujhe lagta tha ki uske sath bahut bura hua ye to mujhe yakeen tha ki wo bahut udas hai ..use apni life se bahut sikayat hai. apne life me usne dhoke bahut khaye hai ,,,, dekhte dekhte time beetne laga ek din mai mall gaya tha movies dekhne uska call aaya usne mujhe ” I LOVE U ” kaha maine bola mujhe thik se sunayi nahi diya usne phir ” I LOVE U ” raat ko jab phone pe baat karte huye maine pucha to usne kaha mai to apne papa , bhai and dosto ko ye bolti rahti hui…ye sun kar mera dil to kabu me aa gaya par mere aankho se aansu nikal aaye.. uske mai itna kareeb chala gaya ki uske liye mai apne sare kaam chor deta tha…sayad 11 nov se yaisa koi din bhi na raha ho jis din se hum log ek dusre ko 5-6 baar cal na karte honge..agar mai cal nahi karta tha to uska call jarur aata tha..wo mujhe apna ek freind samjhne lagi thi jisse wo sab kuch apna dil ke baat share kar sake aur mai bhi apne dil ko samjha chuka tha ki wo mai uska sirf dost banke khus rahunga… kabhi kabhi mai apni limit cross karke usse bahut kharab baate bol deta tha…par wo mere sari galtiya maaf kar deti thi… Ek din usne apne friend ke problem ke bare me bataya to mujhe to pahle se yakeen tha ye friend ka nahi usi ki problem hai Usne mujhe apni tadap ke bare me bataya jise sun kar mai uske dard ke bare me nahi soch sakta tha… Usne apne piyancy ke bare me bataya jisse uska shadi toot chuka tha par jisse wo bahut pyar karti thi.. Wo bahut ro bhi rahi thi uski shadi uske past ko lekar toota tha…. par uska kahna tha ki wo ladka bahut pyar karta hai aur apne family ko jaldi hi mana lega… Kahi na kahi mai bhi uske piyancy ko bhool gaya tha jab usne ye bataya to phir uske future ko lekar pray karne laga ki uski jaldi usse shadiho jaye.. Wo apne piyancy se bahut pyar karti thi aur abhi karti hai… Un dono ko phone me jab bhi baate hoti thi sirf ladki ko rone ke alawa kuch nahi milta tha… jab wo mujhe ye sab batati thi pata nahi ye sab sun kar pata nahi kyo mere aansu aa jate the,,,uska mujhe dukha nahi dekha jata tha maine hamesa uski khusi chahi …mai to chahta tha ki jaldi usse uski shadi ho jaye,,, par mere chahne na chahne se kya fark padta tha kismat ko koi badal nahi sakta sayad us ladke ne apna kismat kahi aur likha rakha tha jo kahi aur shadi kar raha tha ,,,jab ye baat ise pata huya to us ladke se milne jane ke liye betab ho gayi, wo usse last time milna chahti thi par mai nahi chahta tha ki wo us ladke se milne jaye kahi na kahi mujhe us baat ka darr tha jo ek ladke ko kisi ladki ke liye hona chahiye.. par usne jaane ki than li thi usne apne papa se pucha to uske papa ne mana kiya phir bhi wo nahi mani to phir mere baat ki kya value hoti…is baat ka mujhe bahut dukh ho raha tha usi din maine ye jana ladki jisse pyar karti hai usse bahut pyar karti hai…uske liye sab kuch chor sakti hai…maine hi uska ticket karaya tha wo jane se pahle usse phone pe baat karna chahti thi par apne mobile se nahi STD se… us din bhi maine dekha ki wo apne piyancy se baat karke bahut khus thi us din wo ro nahi rahi hai khus ho rahi hai sayed milne ki khusi hai..mai ye sab dekh kar mann hi mann bahut ro raha tha… ye mera us ladke ke liye jalan nahi tha par gum tha is baat ki ki jitna mann se wo apne pati se baat karti hai utna sayed 1 minut bhi nahi ki… jabki hum log din bhar baat hi karte rahte the par ye fark jaruri tha…Uska piyancy akela rahta tha wo job karta tha aur wanha iska aana jana 2 year se tha. jab wo raat ko apne piyancy ke ghar pe thi uske karad mai puri raat nahi so saka tha puri raat kya kya sochta raha aur ek to saturday to next din class jane ki bhi tention nahi… us raat mai soya hi nahi phir sunday ko bahut paresan huya uske kaamo se nahi uske halaat se… Wo kitni mazboor thi ki milne gayi hai aur uske piyancy ne use koi response nahi diya..sunday ko hi uske aane ki ticket thi to mai raat ko to so nahi saka tha din me dosto ke karad nahi so saka…jo train sunday ko aati wo yanah raat me 1 baje thi… to usne mujhe station aane ke liye to mana kiya tha par mai uske sath time bitane ke liye kuch bhi kar sakta tha, jaisa ki mera room 11 baje lock ho jata tha to mai station 10 baje hi pahuch gaya tha train late hone se 1baje aa gayi thi raat bhar na sone ke karad sir me kafi dard tha,, udhar jab station pahucha to bahut sard thi kyonki January tha..waha bhi nahi so saka jab subah huya to class bhi nahi gaya… kismat ka naya mod, yaise hi 2-4 din baad jab wo is hadse se nikli to usne mujhe fir se I LOVE U bola.. mai to usse bahut pyar karta tha aur hu..par 2-3 month baad ki mere pyar ka tumhe pata kab chala ? uska kahna tha ki jab tum station aaye tab..Uske is answer ne ek sawal aur khada kar diya ki Itne din se Use pata nahi chala ya wo ignore karti rahi… but mai ye sab bhool jata hu kyonki mai uske piyancy jaise koi galti nahi karna chahta hu .. look present how is she with u… maine uski hamesa success ki pray ki aur wo aage badhti gayi..exam se lekar college ke sare event me wo first aayi… ye sab dekh kar mai bahut khus tha ….uski khusi meri khusi uska gum mera gum.. par usne kai baar pure class me Insult bhi ki jo mai sirf uske pyar ke karad wo bhi sah gaya…mai uske sath class me chipka rahta tha jo use pasand nahi aata tha ye use irration lagta tha…thik hai meri hi galti hogi sayed mai hamesa sath rahna chahta tha…mai jab dusre couple ko dekhta tha to unhe koi problem nahi hoti thi..ho sakta hai apni apni soch ki baat hai,,, mujhe ye kharab nahi lagta tha ki mai uske sath hu ya nahi par koi aur uske sath ladka rahta tha jarur mujhe gusaa aata tha wo bhi vaise ladke jinke intention main janta tha.. college ke time hi kuch aur mere dost ne mera sath chor diya…mujhe pata nahi wo karad ye hai ya nahi… par iske pyar me mai sab kuch bhool jata tha jo pyar mujhe ghar se kabhi nahi mila wo pyar mai yanha se pura karna chahta tha.. mai suru se apne ghar se 6th class door raha hu.. wo jab acche mood me rahti tho bahut achha baat karti thai agar gusse me ho to baat hi nahi karti thi..girls me koun si ye nayi baat hai gusaa to sab me hota hai.. Mujhe jab wo apne past ke bare me batati to mai bahut guar se sunta tha kyonki mere ko koi problem nahi hoti thi. mujhe uske present se matlab tha par mujhe uske baato se hairani hoti thi.. Wo mujhe bata rahi hai wo sach hai ya jo mujhe nahi bata rahi hai wo …ya jo mujhse boli hai wo jhoot hai ..bahut sare sawal the jiska answer na janna hi thik tha mere liye…maine hamesa us par trust kiya aaj bhi karta hu.. par usne jab bataya ki Uske Piyancy ke gift ke bare me to mere us Chain ka kya? har kisi ka past hota uska bhi tha ya nahi, ye dekh ke bhi mujhe koi fark nahi padta hai.. dekte dekhte hum log itne kareeb aa gaye ki ghumne hill station gaye wanha hum log e sath me time bitaya wo mere life ke sabse yaadgaar din the…Uske baad wo mujhe apne ghar ASAM le ke gayi wanha UNCLE, Aunty se mila wo bahut aache hai ..unke ghar se mujhe bahut pyar mila ..Hum dono itne kareeb aa gaye the uske ghar ka 2 din ka pyar bhi mujhe sari beeti huyi life se bahdkar hai.. US time Uski aanko pe apna pyar, meri liye uski khusi, uski chehre ki chamak kuch aur thi..mai uske pyar feel kar sakta tha… par ab sab kuch badal gaya hai Hum dono ke beech pahle bhi jhagre hote the mai use mana leta tha wo maan bhi jaati thi…Jhagre ka karad hamesa mai hi rahta tha use hamesa lagta tha ki mai jhooth bol raha hu… mai kahta kuch aur tha samjhti kuch aur thi ..usne mere sach ki bhi jhoot bana diya ki mai kuch nahi kar sakta tha,, mai use blame nahi kar raha hu..pahle mere har baat use thik lagti thi par ab sab kuch badal sa gaya hai galti kisi ko ho meri ya uski … “koi kisi se itna pyar kare to uski baat buri nahi lag sakti yaar”… wo dheere dheere badal rahi thi , mai use hamesa samjhata tha ki tum change ho rahi ho par wo sayd serious nahi le rahi thi, mera mera rona bhi use nahi dikh raha tha..Usko manane ke liye mai ASAM bhi gaya huya tha, socha tha mere wanha jane sab kuch thik ho jayega par mera aana use sahi nahi laga wo mujhse milne bhi aayi to majburi me..mujhe ye nahi pata tha ki girls ko kisi ka aake manana bahut kharab lagta hai. Aaker ek host ki tarah pura khyal rakha jaise ki mai uska guest hu…mai wanha itni door bhi gaya to ek din wo apna class bhi nahi chor sakti ..Wo coaching karti thi.mere jaane se aur baat bigad gayi jo kuch tha wo bhi mai kho diya…..wo mere se dheere dheere nafrat karne lagi thi… “maine bhi vahi kiya jo usne kabhi kisi aur ke liye kiya tha” samne wala ko bhi gusaa aa sakta wo bhi kuch kah sakta hai… wo mujhe pahle jaise time nahi de pati thi..mera shaddi .com id tha jab use pata chala to bahut kharab laga par jab wo kisi aur ko apne shadi ka request send karti hogi to mere ko kitna feel hota hoga ye use kabhi yahsas nahi hoga… maine aaj tak kabhi us par gusaa nahi kiya par pata nahi uske badalte huye behaviur ko dekhkar maine wo use kuch bol diya… kyonki abhi wo mere se baat bhi karti rahti to mere sath nahi rahti thi, uska mann kahi na kahi aur rahta tha..uske life me bahut se problem hai ye bhi karad ho sakta hai,, uska khud ka tention bhi karad ho sakta hai ya kuch aur ho jo mai samajh nahi paya… par other state bhi karad ho sakta hai….. par mujhe ab wo pyar nahi dikhta tha jo pahle kabhi aur tha…. par maine jo pyar uske piyancy ke liye dekha hai wo pyar mai chahta tha …jo mujhe kabhi nahi mil sakta ab..mai to hamesa uske dukh ya sukh me tha par mere probel me wo kabhi mere pass thi hi nahi… na mai apne dosto ko pa saka na mera pyar hai mere pass…kitne sapne dekhe sab toot gaye … uske pyar aur mere pyar me ek fark jarur tha.. “mai uske liye apne dosto ko bhool jata tha aur wo apne dosto ke liye mujhe bhool jati thi” agar tumhe dubara kisi se pyar ho to use kabhi mat chorna…. ho sake to mujhe maaf kar dena par mai itna bura nahi jitna tumne mujhe socha kash aaj tum mera yakeen karo… still i love u so much ………… par jo ho chuka hai use to mai badal nahi sakta par agar mujhe govt job mil jaye to aane wale kal ko badal sakta hu…
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