Meri Adhuri Mohabbat – AZAR

Doston ye meri zindegi ki adhuri mohabbat h jo mujhe hamesha yaad rhega uss insan ko kbhi bhula nhi paunga…Pata nhi use mujhse pyar tha bhi ya nhi so frnds aaiye meri barbadi ki story sunata hun…

Aajse 1 year phle ki baat h tb me bht akela rhta tha mtlab dost to the magar aisa koi bhi meri zindegi me nhi aayi thi jisko me apna zindegi bana sakun jisko me apni dil ki batei share kr saku mujhe kbhi bhi koi ladki se bat krna acha nhi lagta tha mtlab sarm aata tha agar koi ladki mujhse phle bat bhi krti toh me bat krta tha apne taraf se kbhi kisi ladki se bat nhi krta tha aise hi din gujarta rha waqt bita chala gaya me tb 12th ka exam diya hua tha result nhi aaya tha.So frnds mujhe hamesha online rhna acha lagta tha fb pe doston chating movie dekhna etc. Me fb bht use krta tha actually frnd i’m musmil so mene ek muslim ladki ko frnd request bheja tha to accept bhi kr liya tha aaj bhi mujhe wo din yaad h jis din usse meri phli bar bat hui thi wo din Wednesday ka tha 18th May 2016 uska naam tha Ruksar so mene use hii bheja to usne fouran reply kiya actually uska profile ka pic jo tha dekh kr mujhe laga sayad ye meri phchan ki h to mene usi andaz se bat ki fir usne mera nike pucha mene kaha (AZAR) naam to suna ui hoga usne kaha han cricketer h na.fir mene unka naam pucha to kaha (Ruksar) mujhe lg rha tha k me janta hun inhe pr ye koi ar hi the to me kaha sayad apka naam Rani hona chahiye unhone ne kaha kyu mene kaha mujhe pasand h to unhone kaha thik fir aap mujhe Rani hi bulao ar me apko Raj bulaungi mujhe ye naam bht pasand h mene kaha thik h fir mene unka address pucha unhone kaha Kolkata mujhe bht ajib laga socha inse kya bat karun ar ye to mujhse bht door rhte h kyun k me odisha ka hun fir mene kaha me odisha se hun aise hi dono me hamesha batein chalti rhti thi wese unta bhi sahise bat nhi hoti thi pr dhere dhere hone lagi me unse bht mazak kiya krta tha ar wo bhi ab thodi hi din baad Ramzan ka din suru hone wale the toh unhone kaha ab me online nhi aaungi ab ramzan suru hone wala h to

gharpe bht busy rahungi toh ramzan k bad hi online aaungi mene kaha thik h fir kuch din gaye me unhe miss krne laga tha akhir batchit ko thode hi din hue the pr avhe dost ban gaye the fir kuch din baad fb pe unka msg aa gaya mene kaha are tum to online nhi aane wale the unhone kaha tumhari yaad aayi to mene kaha mazakat kro kaha nhi mazak nhi kr rhi hun sach me to mene maan liya fir wo hamesha online aane lagi dhere baat badhne lagi thi bat bat me me o mujhe mazak me propose kr deti thi to mujhe ek alag sa filling aata tha aise me bhi unhe bol deta tha fir aise chalta rha ab mene unhe dekha nhi tha pr dekhne ko bht man kr rha tha pr unhone meri pic profile me deka tha ek din mene unhe whatsapp ka no bhi manga to unhone kaha ke nhi chaliti mene kaha thik h fir kuch din bad fir apne aap hi mujhe whatsapp chalate ho k nhi puchi to mene no mangli ar wo de bhi di fir hamari bat fb se whatsapp pe hone lagi fir thodi din bad wo mujhe fir ek bar propose krne lage ar kaha is bar mazak nhi kr rhi hun uss waqt tk me unhe chahene laga tha mene kaha agar fir se mazak kr rhe hogi to dubara bat nhi karuga unhone kaha nhi mazak nhi h fir mene bhi accept kr liya propose aise kuch din bad mene unka no manga fir phli bar unse ph pe bat kiya to yar bht nervous lag rha tha yr kya bat karun yahi soch kr bs thodi si bat kr ke mene ph cut kr diya pr hamari hamesha whatsapp pe batchit cha rha tha phle to me 11.00 baje hi so jata tha pr aab 2.00 baje sote the hamari jab roza ka shaheri hota tha uske kuch der phle hi sote the fir 3.30 baje uthna padta tha kbhi kbhi sote hi nhi the aise hi hamari bate badne lagi thi fir unhone mujhe bht jhunt

bhi kaha tha wo ye tha k wo Kolkata k nhi balke balesore ke the ar unka naam bhi kuch ar tha. magar mujhe hamesha unpe saq hua krta tha kyu k me agar jald so bhi gaya hunga fir bhi wo der raat tk online rhte the magar me unhe kbhi sawal nhi krta tha bas apne andar hi andar ghabra rha tha aise hi hamari pyar chalta rha phle phle toh ye bs timepass lag rha tha fir ye dhere dhere badhne laga tha pr ab tk mene unhe dekha nhi tha jb bhi unhe pic magta tha to hamesha ek hi jawab ap mujhse pyar krte ho ya meri pic se tb me chup ho jaya krta pr mujhe to unhe dekhna hi tha akhir kab tk aise chalta ab Eid ka din bhi karib aa rha tha to unse kaha k tumhe aab jarur pic dena hi padega ar wo han bhi kahe fir wo din aa hi gaya me subhase pic ka intejar me tha subha jb Eid ka namaz padh kr aaya to sidhe online hi gaya tab wo bhi online the fir wo salam kiye mene bhi jawab diya fir unhone kaha mera Eid ka gift kaha h mene kaha mango kya chahte ho tab wo bada pyara sa jawab diye the unhone kaha mere liye to tum hi sab kuch ho bas tumhe hamesha chahti hun bas tum kbhi mujhe chord kr mat jana tb meri aankhon me aansun aagaya tha kyun k me bhi unhe hadse jyada pyar krne laga tha fir unhone pic sham ko deneko kaha fir jab sham ko me jese online aaya tab wo pic diye tab mujhe unki taswir se koi fark nhi padta tha kyun k mujhe unke dilse pyar tha taswir se nhi. mene kaha bht ache lag rhe ho fir unhone mujhe apni pic dene ko kaha mene bhi de diya aise hi chalta rha finally hum dono me bht pyar create ho chuka tha me unke bina kuch sochta hi nhi tha bas hamesha unke bareme hi. Fir ek din wo mujhe milne ko kahe (Bhadrak,Odisha) jahan khanka ek jagha ka naam wahan Ursh hone wali thi ar wo bhi wahan aane wali thi to wahi milne ka plan bana tha pr wo kahte hein na hum kakh chahe to kya ho jaega ab tak khuda nhi chahega tab tak kuch nhi hoga akhi unse milne me nikal pada unke liye ek pyara sa gift bhi liya tha ar unhe ek ring bhi pahna na chahta tha jo meri hath me tha jo mere liye bht lucky ring tha use mene unhe phnana chahta tha sab tayar tha bht muskil se wahan jane nikla tha raste bhar unse whatsapp pe bate krte krte ja rha tha kahan

pahnche wo yahi bat bar bar puch rhe the me unse milne ko kuch hi der tha uss jagha puhnchne hi wala tha ke tabhi train ki engine fail ho jata h ar wahan bht waqt lag jata h ar wo wahan mera kab se intejar kar rhi thi me phone pe phone kr rhi thi akhir me krta thi kya wo apne family k sath aayi hui thi tab tak bht der ho chuka tha uska family jane ko bol rhe the pr wo mujhse milne k liye dusra hi bahana bata kar alag ek jagha pr mera intejar kr rhi the pr meri kismat me hi usse milna nhi tha toh kese milta fir wo mujhe phone krke bolti h ke ab me ar intejar nhi kar sakti akhir wo bhi akeli kitne der ar intejar krti fir wo chale gaye fir unke jane ke 20 minut bad me wahan pahnchta hun pr tab tk wo ja chuke the mujhe bht bura lag rha tha kuch acha nhi lag rha tha us raat mene khana bhi nhi khaya bas sad ho kar ghumta rha fir subha train pakad kr wahan se nakal chuka tha kuch hi der hua tha unka msg aaya ke yahin se jyada door to nahi h aa jao na mujhe apse milna h par tab to train me tha kya krta wese hi wapas aana pada dono hi bht sad the ar apni kismat ko kosh rhe the aise hi kuch din guzarta rha fir sab bht acha chal rha tha wo mujhe bht namo se bulati thi khas krke wo mujhe (kaddu) bulaya krti thi ar mujhe bht acha lagta tha jab pyar wo pyar se bulaya krti thi ar me usse (Vinddi) bulaya krta tha.Mujhe hamesha uski fikar rhta tha uski choti choti baton ka khayal rakha krta tha usko gupchup bht pasand hua krta tha pr usse uski pet me dard hua krta tha isliye me usse hamesha rokta tha ar wo meri sunti bhi thi ar jab jyada man krta tha to mujhe puch liya krti thi.Aur wo bhi meri bht fikar krti thi mujhe hamesha sahi waqt pe khana khilati thi ar jab me khana nhi khata tha to apni kasam diya krti thi warna bolti ke tum agr nhi khaoge to me bhi nhi khaungi ar kahti ke meri har bat

tumhe manna padega.mujhe uski aise haq jatana bht acha lagta tha.Hum dono bht khus rhte the din bhar batein hoti rhti thi wo mujhe pyar se babu bulaya krti thi ar me usse jaan bulaya krta tha pr usse mera jaan bulana usse bht acha lagta tha ar jb kabhi bhi meri juban pe mar jane ki bat bhi aa jati thi to naraz ho jati thi aise hi hamari pyar gahra ho gaya tha wo hamesha kahti thi kbhi mujhe chord kr nhi jaegi.Wo hamesha mujhse ek bat bolkar mujhse mazak kiya krti thi aise phone bat krte krte jan buj kr sad ho jaegi ar bolne lagegi ki meri shadi taye ho gayi h ar me tab bht dar jata tha ar bht sad ho jata tha fir me kuch bolun usse phle hi sorry bolke mazak kr rhi thi bol deti thi…Fir kuch aisa hua dosto ap log bhi pyar kiye hoge ar pyar me aise chote mote jhagde hoti to rhti h ar wese hi hum dono k bich bhi hoti rhti thi usse gussa bht aati thi ar wo gusse me mujhe bht kuch bol jati thi jo bhi dil me aata fir bad me sorry bolti thi aise ek bar hamare bich ladhai hogai dono me hamesha ki tarha batchit band ho gayi pr hamesha me hi phle use mana kar phle bat kiya krta tha pr iss bar mene aise kuch nhi kiya fir usne mujhe ek Unknown no pe mujhe miss call krle paresan krna suru kr diya ar mujhe pata tha ki ye meri jaan hi h aise hi 5 din hogaye hamare baten band hue fir mujhse raha nhi gaya ar mene jb use phone kiya ar bat krne ki kosis ki to wo kahne lage ke wo mujhe nhi jante ar hamare bich jo tha wo sab mazak tha mera dil tootne laga tha fir socha nhi sayad koi wajha hogi fir me chup rha kuch din bad wo whatsapp pe msg ki ar batein fir hone lagi ar tab mujhe wo sari sach batane lagi boli ke mere liye rishta aaya hua h ar hamesha ki tarha mujhe mazak laga par usne jab khuda ki kasam kha kr boli to mano jese meri zindegi khatm hogayi thi mujhe kuch samajh me hi nhi aa rha tha pr tab usne mujhe himmat di thi kaha ke kuch nhi hoga khuda pe yakin rakho ar dekhna wo hame kabhi alag nhi hone dega ar me uski baton se tham sa gaya tha kuch din bita chala gaya pr jese humne socha tha wese kuch bhi ho rha tha thodi dino bad ladke wale usse

dekhne aane wale the dhere dhere me tootne laga tha ar uske yakin kajor ho gya tha wo dhere mujhse normally batein krne lagi thi uski batein krne ka tarika badal tha ar mujhe bhi uski wajha pta chal rha tha.Me use hamesha namaz padhne kaha krta tha pir ek din usne kaha mene namaz padhna chod diya aajse mene kaha kyu unhine kaha k khuda pe yakin mt rakho ye kuch nhi kr sakta..wo bhi andar se mujhse jyada toot chuki thi pr usne kbhi apna dard mujhe nhi dikhaya mujhe aise lagta hi nhi tha ke usse koi dard bhi h bas uski batein krne ka tarika badal chuka tha.Kuch din bad usne mujhe achanak se kaha ke chalo bhag chalte hein mujhe bhi kuch samajh nhi aa rha tha kyu k meri abhi bas 12th hi complete hui aise me agar use kahin le bhi jaun to use kese khush rakh paunga pr mujhe usse khona bhi nhi tha mene tab kuch soche samjhe than liya tha hum kahin chale jaege fir usne mujhe 1 din ka waqt manga sochne fir dusre din uska jawab aaya wo sadly kahne lagi kbhi socha h hamare chale jane ke bad sabka kya hoga actually meri bhi bht se problem the me apna family ka ek hi ladka tha mere papa bhi akele the ar me bhi ar meri ek sister bhi shadi nhi hui thi ar me apne mummy papa ko kese chod sakta tha pr mujhe uss waqt bas mera apna pyar hi nazar aata tha meri jaan se dur na hone ka hi bas khayal tha pr uske bhi bht se problem the wo apni papa se bht pyar krti thi uski papa ke haton se hi khana khaya krti thi to use bhi apna papa ka izzat ki fikr satati thi unki family bhi badi thi wo apni family me sabse badi thi ar isi wajha se usne bhag janese mana kar diya ab tak ladke walon ne meri jaan ko pasand bhi kr liya tha unki sagayi bhi taye ho chuki thi sab kuch bht jald jald ho rha tha fir usne apni mummy ko batana chaha pr mene usse rok liya kyu k uske mummy ko love marriage se nafrat thi agr wo batati to use kuch krdete issi ke dar se use mene rok liya tha mene apni ghar me bhi batana chaha tha pr sab kuch bht jald ho rha tha thodi din k bad hi uski sagayi thi ab to uski phone bhi unki mummy le gayi thi kyun k uski shadi hone wali thi par wo apni dost k phone se mujhe msg kiya krti thi fir dekhte hi uski sagayi ho gayi aur me bas dekhta hi rhe gaya.hum log

kbhi bhi rat ko phone call pe bat nhi krte the hamesha chat pe hi bat hoti thi pr tabhi se usne rat ko phone pe bat karna suru kardiya raat raat bhar hum batein kiya krte the unse bichard ne ke dard se phone pe bat krte krte hi me ro padta tha ar wo mujhe bht samjhati unki har ek bat mujhe yaad aati h wo kahti thi tumhari rone se mujhe bhi bard hota plz mt ro mat na…aise hi dhere dhere hum juda hote chale gaye tab tak bhi mene unhe kahta rha chalo na bhag chalte h uska dil to maan jata tha pr log kya sochege badnami ke dar se wo fir mana kar deti thi fir dekte hi dekte uski shati taye ho gayi thi uski shadi (April 28 ko tha friday) pr uske phle hi uska birthday tha (April 15th ko) mene usse bht hi pyar se thik raat ke 12 baje wish kiya tha aaj bhi sab mujhe yaad h wo kahti ke agar tum mere sath hote to ar bhi khush hiti me pr hamari duri hi badh gayi thi wo mujhe tab bhi bas ek bar akhri bar milne ko bula rhi thi par me inkar karta rha kyu k me usse milne kebad usse chord kar aa hi nhi pata ar sayad wo kbhi mujhe bhula hi nhi pati uske shadi hone k bad pr wo mujhe kbhi samajh hi nhi rhi thi bas ek hi zid pe aadi thi pr mene use mana liya tha….fir akhir meri zindegi ka wo manhus din aa hi gaya jab uski shadi thi me uss din ko kbhi bhula nhi paya me uss din pagal jese ho gaya tha pr najane mujhe aise kyi lagta tha ke me usse kbhi juda nhi hunga hum fir ek ho jaeinge pr aisa kuch nhi hua akhir uski shadi ho hi gayi wo mujhse apni shadi k din bhi bat ki thi mujhe samjha rhi thi mujhe apna khayal rakhne ko bol rhi thi apna kasam deke mujhe na rone ki wada de rhi thi doston mujhse ye stori likhi nahi ja rhi h abhi bhi me utna hi ro rha hun jitna tab ro rha tha so frnds wo mujhe ek chotese bache ki tarha samjha rhi thi ar me chup chap sun rha tha mujhe nhi pta ke wo kis hakath me thi kyu k wo sayad iss shadi ko hi apna kismat man li thi wo utna udas nhi thi usse utna dard nhi hua tha jitna mujhe ho rha tha……

Uske shadi k kuch din bad mujhe uski fikar sataya krti thi tab mujhse ar raha nhi gaya mene uske dost ke phn pe msg kr diya tha kuch der bad reply aaya ar wo reply meri jaan ka tha wo usi din hi apne ghar aa rhi thi mujhe bht dard ho rha tha mera dil ko ye bardas nhi ho rha tha ar mere dil me jo kuch aaya mene usse suna diya pr tab usne apni kapde tak badle bina wese hi halath me mujhse bat kr rhi jese wo apne sasural se aayi thi wo sayad hi uss din ro rhi thi ya nhi pta nhi kyu k mene use kbhi rote nhi dekha aise kuch der bat hoti rhi ar tab usne kaha me apko kbhi bhul nhi paungi hum hamesha hi aise rhge jese phle the hamesha wese hi bate karege jese phle krte the pr mujhe uski khusi chaiye the agar me uski ye bat man leta to sayad me uski zindegi tabha kr deta mera kya hota ye mayne nhi rakhta agar mujhse wo bat krti h agr ye bat uski husband ko pta chalta to wo usse kbhi khus nhi rakhta ar uski saza deta uske khusi k liye uske zindegi ache se guzarne k liye mene ek decision liya k uski ek sunuga apne dil pe patthar rakh kr usse battamiji se bat krta rha khud ko dard de kr uski khusi k khatir usse ignore krta rha ar usse meri iss bartab se pta bhi chal chuka tha ke me aise uske khusi k liye kr rha hun pr fir bhi wo mujhse pyar se hi baat kr rhi thi toh mene usse bewafa ke naam se bht kuch kahta rha pr doston wo sab use bolne baad mujhe jitna dard hota tha me jitna rota tha wo koi janta.Fir wo ek bar bolne lagi ke mujhe phle ki trha pyar se propose karo pr mene inkar kiya wo bar bar bolne lagi thi wo mujhe bht mafi bhi mangne lagi thi kyu ke usne mera dil toda tha mujhse pyar krke kisi ar ka ghar basaya tha mene to use mafi de diya pr doston ye dil usse kbhi maf nhi kr paya…wo bar bar mujhe akhri bar propose krne khti rhi pr mene uski ek na suni fir mene usse gusse se dant diya wo okk bol kr chali gyi 2 din tak uska koi msg nhi aaya pr dhadi k bad hamesha wo msg kiya krti thi me online aa kr bhi usse ignore krta tha pr nhi krti thi fir wo msg ki pr mene koi reply nhi ki sayad wo samajh gayi thi ki issi me hi usi ki bhalai h wo din tha 7th August ka ar tab se usse meri koi bat nhi hoti….wo ar tab se online hi nhi aati..

Aisi hi thi meri life ki end doston meri zindegi to yahin khatm ho gayi….ar bhi bht sari bate hein jo mene nhi likha bht personal the ar nhi bhi pr usse likhta toh story ar bhi sayad lambi ho jati..

Aaj bhi tum jahan ho sayad hi tum bht khush hogi..Meri jaan me aaj bhi tumhe utna hi pyar krta hun jitna phle kbhi krta tha…meri jaan tumhari bht yaad satati h har raat apni aankhen num ho jati h tumhari yaad me bht yaad aate tum bht yaad aate ho…..????

 

Dil pe kya guzri wo anjaan kya jane,
pyar kise kehte hai wo nadan kya jane,
hawa ke sath udh gaya ghar is parinde ka.
kaise bana tha.. ghosla wo tufaan kya jane!

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